Thursday, October 30, 2014
Monday, October 27, 2014
Quite often I use this term to describe people who smell their clothes before they wear them for cleanliness, although one might argue that's not clean at ALL. But last week I had another sniff test kind of experience. I was melting in guilt at work all day because I'd used my friends deodorant without asking. I had a feeling he wasn't a germaphobe, and he wouldn't give two shits, but I just felt so BAD! So on my break I hoofed it over to the drug store to buy him a replacement. But I wanted to get him the same kind, and even though I knew the brand, there's a large variety of scents. So I started smelling my armpit, and checking it against the pit sticks. Well lady McPrim&Proper strolls by, and I can't even describe the look she gave me. As if I'd insulted her religion! Stolen her first born child! I'm not sorry my unusual behaviour offended you so much, it's how I get my shits and giggles. Keep walking!
Sunday, October 19, 2014
My female brain automatically jumped with joy thinking, "YES! Me too!" I smiled. I turned to him and said, "Oh damn, you're good!" He wore a cowboy hat that he'd take off and put on the girl he was dancing with. He made whatever girl he was giving his attention to feel like the centre of his world. He could dance. I couldn't help it, I was naturalistically observing/blatantly staring at him for a while. Not a single doubt in my mind he got a least a few phone numbers that night. No Grams, not mine. I saw through him, but I appreciate his style despite finding his level of confidence slightly off putting. He should teach classes. Go you game guy!
But this is a running thread isn't it? My most memorable trick or treating experiences involved a guy who dug a grave in his front yard, and laid in it super still until we got close enough for him to grab our ankles. And what's too far? One parent jumped out of the bush and chased out of the yard, screaming after with us. I'm also pretty sure that's part of the reason mom never argued to stay home to hand out the candy, and she was scary enough without dressing up. Dad never minded taking us out either, but I found out much later it wasn't just coffee in those travel mugs..
Monday, October 6, 2014
I get excited about grocery shopping for a multitude of reasons that don't make sense, but this one I know I'm not alone on. One of my favourite pass times at the grocery store is peeking at other people's buggies and carts, and often wondering how they're going to eat for a week. Especially bachelors, they're my favourite. Easy to spot because they're alone and wearing a wrinkled shirt, but you have to spot them quick, they're never there long. Toilet paper, a frozen pizza and pepperoni sticks eh? Good luck my friend. You're only here because all the take out places you have the numbers memorized for are closed. Sometimes couples lend some entertainment too though. What they make compromises on, and what they're most definitely not going to compromise about. Ever. "Put everything else is the cart that's mine back. Go ahead. We ARE getting Jet Puffed. I just can't live without spreadable marshmallow for a week..." On the contrary, parents grocery shopping scare me. They always look half dead. Like the last time they had a good night's sleep was years before, and if you poked them, they'd fall right over. You poor things. Find a sucker like me to watch your kids, you need a break. :)
Sunday, October 5, 2014
Wednesday, October 1, 2014
And now a huge SHOUT OUT to someone I consider one of my closest friends, KRISTI ROOTS.
Who despite my constant bombardment still has NOT read my blog. This one's for you my love. Now click the sidebar and check out all my old posts. Sacrifice one of those nights you stay up until 3am on Netflix, there WILL be a test later.